Thursday 18 June 2020

Day 86 Of Daily Journal

Day 86 of daily journal and I have not gotten out of bed all day, it has been a long day and it is going to be a long night of no sleep and just lying there.

Today, I did not get out of my bed all day because I have not had the motivation to do so I have just been sleeping and just trying to recover from everything that has been happening lately. I am in a very difficult potion right now and it is too long to try and explain to people. The worst part is I have got no control over it and I can not change it because it is not my actions that have caused it.

Tomorrow, I have got to go to work which will be a first for me as I have not been able to work in a long time due to the current events that have been happening in the world. It is going to be good to just take my mind of things and it might help me to get out of this slump that I am in. These days are getting harder and harder each day and I do not know how many more days I can actually keep this up for.

Everything that has happened to me throughout these past few days has been out of my control and that is the worst bit because it is not how I wanted things to go but they have now and I have now got no more left in me to keep fighting. It has been the worst few days for me and every time I think about it I get worked up and it ends up making me feel worse and worse. 

I am trying to do everything that I can to take my mind of things but I just can't it is all just spinning around in my head and I can't do it anymore. I don't know what I can do to make myself feel better about it because I partly blame myself for what has happened even though I know that it is not my fault.

This is only going to be a short update as I have not got anything else to talk about really. I am trying my best to keep going but I just can't. 

Stay Frosty Much Love IFB 

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