Day 61 Of Lockdown Journal |
Today was an alright day it was not great and it was not good it was just alright. I made it through the day so that is all that matters. I had another argument with that girl again and things have got a lot more complicated between us but we are still trying. My mum is back from work now for the next couple of days so that is a good thing as I get to see her but that is probably the only good thing that has happened today.
Tomorrow is probably going to be another alright day nothing much will happen I will just try and make it through the day again. I want to have a good day again but I am not sure if that will be possible with everything that is going. I will be spending more time with my mum tomorrow if she is awake when I am, our body clocks are different as she has still got to go to work whereas I don't have to really.
This lockdown is really testing whatever relationship I have got with that girl and it is also making me question everything again which I do not like. I am still not sure if I ever will be able to trust her again I want to try but I know it is going to be very hard. I am starting to question the small things and that is not good. I want to try my best to get through this but I am not sure if it will be possible.
Tomorrow I am going to be focusing a lot more on myself and just enjoying the day as best as I can without thinking too much about everything else that is going on. It is going to be complicated for us for a couple of weeks I hope that we make it through this without any more arguments or anything like that. I hate having to question the little things but when someone breaks your trust it is the only thing you can do.
I wish things were different and I wish that I did not have to overthink things as much as I do. I hope that anyone else that is not living with there significant other can make it through this lockdown as well because I know from experience that it is really going to test the strength of your relationships.
Stay frosty much love IFB :)
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